The end

Kill the man with the ball

Spring smells, fall breeze

Races

Bikes

Scooters

Ice Cream truck sound

“No, you ask, my parents will say yes if you ask.”

“Can (insert name) come out.”

“Make sure you are in before those street lights come on.”

Running home hoping being a few minutes late won’t be too late.

Video games.

Family that had no blood.

Meals made with magic, Love, and deliciousness.

Sunday morning gospel music, afternoon crunk.

-I Love School song- remixed to I hate school.

Book fairs but no money to buy books.

Spelling bees, standardized test, and field days.

Walking home from school.

Looking for trouble and always finding it.

FIGHTS.

Bloody Knuckles, Open Chest, Neck, and B.B. Butcher

MORE FIGHTS.

swimming and hot ass summers.

Being a parent because mine was absent or at work.

Thinking of who I need to protect and leaving myself vulnerable.

No phone calls on my birthday.

1st day of school mama was always there.

Straight As.

Band.

Art class.

Spanish.

Talented and Gifted.

Music, music, and more music.

Poetry.

Scraps,cuts, scars, blood, and a bunch of scabs.

Perfect Attendance.

Hearing them argue over the phone.

Hearing him put his hands on her, her, and me too.

Being yelled at.

Scrutinized.

Judged.

Poor circumstances.

Poor decisions.

Poor mistakes.

Smiling and not meaning it.

Laughing and it wasn’t funny.

Dumbing it down to fit in.

In more pain and never asking for reprieve.

Horseback rides.

Summers in the country.

Planting, painting, camping, fresh air.

Video games.

Sharing because his dad didn’t care.

Always having OGs because they recognized my heart.

Leaving her because I was more of a liability than an asset.

Becoming a man through mistakes.

Escaping peer pressure just to invite it to my birthday.

Sacrifice.

Doing what was necessary.

Treating others.

Filling up you, while on E.

Poor choices.

Poor people.

Poor words.

Poor actions.

Drunken Sex, High head, and forgotten morals.

Ethics, discernment, and influence.

A cycle.

FUCK.

WHAT WAS I THINKING.

I WASN’T

Self-deprecating.

Enough was never enough.

So I aimed for higher, do more, do better, do more, do better.

It was my fault, it’s always my fault. (shrugs)

Insecurity.

She made it clear I was in the way.

Lies told and received.

Fight, if it’s is in the way FIGHT.

Chill you got a FEW cases.

Be easy, don’t flip and smack the shit out of him or her.

Don’t let the hood come out if you can’t channel it.

Fake, they all fake, I can see right through it.

Losing.

Treating the people, who I love and care about.

Rumors.

Deceit.

“Pussy! don’t get it twisted.”

Gym to work it off.

Bruised ribs, broken jaw, dislocated knee, fractured ankle, scared hands, wounded body, broken.

Lost.

Love.

Relationships failing, self-destruction.

Music, music, music.

Unhappy, stressed, tired, drained.

Unsure where to go.

Poor decision.

PRIDE

LUST

WRATH

ENVY

GLUTTON.

Trying to survive, not living just finding a reason to get away from it all.

Do everything you possibly can, learn as much as often as you can, never stay too comfortable.

Play, laugh, express.

Acknowledge the past then let it stay there.

Decide on a destination and enjoy the ride.

Travel.

Love.

Enjoy.

Be present.

Help with no thoughts of return.

Clear illusions.

Stop settling and lowering your standards.

Stop second guessing yourself.

Your name means God’s Gift.

Use it wisely.

Be present.

Give and never count anything but blessings.

Money, clothes, cars, women…

They all will come and go…

Protect those you love dearly….

Respect those who don’t know how to…

Be everything and do not apologize one moment for accomplishing it all.

Laugh hard, love hard, live hard.

Rest Well.

This world is yours. Explore it!

Make it all count before….

You have to go home!

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Written by Confident1al

Discovery within discovery, a place of genuine growth! Expressing through the many ways I feel comfortable and uncomfortable doing so....

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