Diary of A Black Man #36

Dear Diary,

Today I had to sacrifice, I had to let go, I had to have a temporary casualty and it inflicted my own heart. It hurt me to hurt one whom I love it bothered me to leave someone whom which I desired to be in my presence. I shed tears and seemingly the pattern of last years innate ability to feel openly and expressively has undoubtedly seeped into this year as well. Not ashamed of it, nor emasculated by it. I feel myself overcoming and overpowering my ego. As it merely is not by chance that this is merely a new found level of depth and emotional expression. My life is been very low and exponentially high. Yet today was a low my tears weren’t alone, they were not only mine they were one whom I love one who melts my entire being. So today was a test, one that I can not merely take lightly. My life seems to be crumbling before my eyes yet it somehow is demolition of the false teachings and ways which had enslaved me in a place that was not merely designed for me. I love the world and today, I felt love in pain. Although a tough lesson to learn, it made for an even tougher one to teach. Yet absence makes the heart grow fonder. So until next time…

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