Diary of A Black Man #46

Dear Diary,

You know I woke up today finding myself in a frenzy. Frantically believing that my self-confidence was merely a mirage. That it was a fabric of lesser quality. Wait is my ideal of passion fleeting. Trends find no enrichment to my soul. How unnatural I feel in the presence of the average. Swaying my perception I battle my thoughts. Then polemic I attack the previous and come to a separate conclusion.

Wow today I woke up to a lie and I caught it and as I held it then swiftly let it fly free. My self-confidence is not a facade but an earned treasure. I now understand it is one that is self-induced. Extrinsic quality does not quantify it, intrinsic energy drives it but somehow just somehow divine spirit defines and fortifies it.

Breaking is a part of the process, falling is the lesson, failing is the test, disappointment is the bargain. For glory comes not to those who easily look to obtain it, how could I be so blind I knew of these teachings. I possess these tools, I believed I had to carry it all that it was mine alone to conquer. Such folly to designate an immeasurable and infinite role to such a limited entity.

Today felt like: weakness leaving my body…

Today sounded like:

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